5 years 2 months 4 days

Day 1891. It was once again a day to go to the hospital. Randy left with Tammy and Emmy at 7:45 to take Emmy to his soccer camp. A few minutes later I left with Sammy to take him to kindergarten, which he was very happy about. When I dropped him off, his group leader asked me about his health, as Randy had mentioned something to her, and I told her I was heading to the hospital right then. She said to let her know if they could do anything.

I got back on the subway and rode it downtown, then I took a tram to go to the hospital. I got there pretty early and sat down by the entrance to wait for my friend. A good, long-time friend of mine had offered on Sunday to accompany me to the hospital, and I gladly said yes. What a difference it made to not be alone! She arrived early too, and together we headed up to 8C, where I registered and then sat down in the purple section, which is the oncological department.

My appointment was for 9 am, and we got there before then. I was wondering how long it was gonna be this time before I was called in. Last time I had waited nearly 2 hours. I was very tired once again and had to close my eyes while talking with my friend. I expected to meet the head doctor who'd tell me about the operation and give me a date, but that's not what happened.

At about 9:45 my friend spoke a quick prayer that I'd be called in before 10 am, and five minutes later they called my name. There was a young, female doctor in the room I had not met yet. And she was a lot nicer than the middle-Eastern doctor I had the last two times. I ended up being with her for just over an hour. They took my blood once again to check my tumor markers, now that the infection is down or even gone. And she also wanted to take her own look at the cyst even though they've already taken a least a hundred pictures of it. She had to first wait for the one powerful machine they have to be available which took some time. Then we went to another room, where her wand poked around inside of me in every which way once again. At least it didn't last as long as last time. As they needed the machine for the next person, we returned to the previous room.

Then I finally received the speech I was waiting for. She explained to me what they were going to do during the operation that would last from 1 to 8 hours, depending on what they'd find inside of me. First they are going to cut a small hole and see whether the cyst is easy to move. If yes, they put a bag inside, over the cyst, and pull it out. Then they send the cyst to the lab and will know within 15 minutes whether it's benign, malignant or borderline (neither one nor the other). The result then dictates what happens next.

If the cyst is not easy to move, they'll have to slit my belly open from top to bottom and cut it out. If it's benign, they take my ovaries out, if it's malignant, they also take the uterus and whatever else is affected. Being cut open like that means 7 days in the hospital and then 4 weeks of recovery at home. If only the small hole is necessary, I'd be in the hospital for 2 days and recover quickly.

I had been waiting that whole time to find out the date, but that was not going to happen after all. They have a "tumor board" on Tuesday, when the doctors sit down together and discuss all the cases and come to an agreement what the best procedure would be. She said that they would probably agree to do what she had explained to me today. I'm going to get a phone call on Tuesday to find out whether that's the case or not. Then they prioritize all the different cases, which determines the dates of the operation. Later next week I'm gonna get a call to find out when the operation is.

I already had an appointment to come in Thursday morning for a full torso CT scan so they could look whether there is any spread within my body. Today she told me I needed another procedure done, which is also gonna happen on Thursday, right after the CT scan. They're gonna punctuate my bladder and blow it up to see whether my bladder is alright or has been affected by the cyst pushing on it. It's not gonna be pleasant. But it's a miracle she was able to get that appoinment on Thursday morning. All the doctors have always told the people they were talking to on the phone that I have three little kids which makes me a priority.

It was 11 am, and I was finally done and free to go. Again, I'd been so very blessed to have my friend there with me. What a gift! We walked to the exit together, then she had to get going. I made my way to the tram to ride it back to town and then take the subway home.

It was still a little early to pick up Sammy, but we decided I'd do so as I was going by the kindergarten. I stopped at the grocery store to buy myself a ready-to-eat salad, then I walked to the kindergarten. It was noon, rather than 12:30, when I got there, and Sammy was right by the entrance. He was strapped into the walker and walking all over the place. He was really happy to see me. I stopped at the bathroom, then took the wheelchair to him, so he could sit in it. I talked to the group leader again, then we left to go home.

We got on the subway and were home by 12:15 pm. Tammy was really happy to see me again; she had spent the morning home alone with Daddy. I warmed up the rest of the pizza for her and Randy, and ate my salad. I was pretty tired, but it was already 1 pm by the time I was done and I had a 2:30 pm student. Still, I needed to get a nap before teaching. So I lay down and set my alarm for 2 pm. Unfortunately it was rather loud with everyone upstairs, but I did get some sleep. It was hard getting up at 2 pm, and it was only then that Randy was going downstairs with the kids.

I still had to prepare for my student, doing quite a bit of scanning. I then taught until 3:30 pm. Randy was already coming back upstairs at that time. He had to pick up Emmy at 4:30 pm and had to leave at 4 pm. Sammy insisted he wanted to come along again and not stay home with me and Tammy, and so he went with Daddy. Tammy and I went downstairs for piano practice. It took us 15 minutes, and she was doing really well. Three weeks is just too long between lessons - there are two holiday Saturdays in a row without classes.

We came back upstairs, and I gave her a cutting, gluing and coloring exercise to do. Then Grandma called to find out about my hospital visit. We were just about to end our conversation, when Randy and the boys returned home at 5 pm, and the boys wanted to talk to Grandma as well, which they did.

Emmy had once again had a good day at the soccer day, but it's a long, tiring day for him. I had already made their dinner, as I had another student at 5:30 pm. That way they could eat, when they got hungry.

I finished teaching at 6:20 pm, and by then they were pretty much done eating. It was bathtub time. They had fun in the bathtub, ate some more, then we got them ready for bed. I read them a bedtime story, then they went to bed. I then went to the kitchen to make myself soup. After having eaten, I started working on the computer.

Now it's midnight and time to take care of the dishes before going to bed.